Football jokes

[PGY Tiercel]

At least there is humor in being a UK Fan. Add anymore you may have (though lets not make them all about Kentucky)

A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a courtroom drama today
when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody
of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his
parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her.
When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents,
The boy cried out that they also beat him. After considering the
remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was
apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of
allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.
After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child
welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the
University of Kentucky Wildcat football team, whom the boy
firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.

[MiamiBando]

PGY... that is friggin' hilarious! I LOVE IT! ROFLMAOPMPWPUB!

[CapitalFalcon]

Here's an oldie but goodie...

Why is Bowling Green so windy?

Because Toledo blows and Miami sucks... I KILL ME!

[TG1996]

A man walked into a bar with his dog. The man was dressed totally in blue and white, from head to toe. Blue hat, sweater, pants, shoes, even his socks were blue. The dog was also dressed in blue and white. Collar, jacket, hat and he had pom-poms.

The man said to the bartender, "My TV went out and it's time for the UK football game. I've never missed a Wildcat football game. Would you let me and my dog watch the game here?"

The bartender said, "You're welcome to stay and watch the game, mister, but your dog can't stay. It's against the health regulations."

"Oh, please. My dog loves the Wildcats, too. I promise he'll behave."

"OK," the bartender said. "But the first time that dog acts up, you're both gone."

"Thank you! Thank you!" the man said and he and the dog took their seats to watch the kickoff.

In a few minutes, UK made a first down. The dog went wild. He shook the pom-poms like crazy. He jumped up and down, then leaped up on the bar. He skipped down the bar, howling, "Bloooooo! Blooooo!" He danced back down the bar and skidded to a stop at his seat.

The bartender said, "Man, I'm amazed! That dog got so excited over a first down. What does he do when they score a touchdown?"

The man said, "I don't know. I've only had him 4 years."

[FalconFanKM]

How does Toledo count to 10??

0 and 1
0 and 2
0 and 3
0 and 4
0 and 5....