From Jim Rome (Wow)
Posted: Wed Dec 08, 2004 10:28 pm
The last few weeks haven't been good few weeks for the Michigan Wolverines. Sure, they are headed to Pasadena for the Rose Bowl, but it hasn’t been easy.
First they get rolled by their arch rival Ohio State and needed to back into the Rose Bowl. Then their all-conference Offensive Lineman went nuts in a bar after urinating on the floor and started playing the ‘do-you-know-who-I-am?’ card then gets tossed in the slam.
And now this: Defensive Lineman Larry Harrison Jr. was suspended from the team after he was arraigned on one count of indecent exposure. He was caught masturbating on the on the porch of a house occupied by several women shortly after midnight. Harrison is also a suspect in a number of other, 14 to be precise, indecent exposure cases. Whoa. It's one thing to have a few too many beers and get into trouble or a fight, but to be a serial masturbator? That’s bad. Very bad.
And head coach Lloyd Carr agrees with me. “These charges are very serious and very alarming. I can only hope that they are not true.”
You and me both, coach. Alarming is putting is mildly. Terrifying, despicable, disgusting, unsanitary are all words that work well here.
I guess everyone likes to get ready for the Rose Bowl in their own unique way. Some guys do extra film study. Some guys put in some extra time in the weight room. Some guys read the playbook. And I guess some guys like to go around town rubbing one out on neighborhood porches. Someone get this guy some help. I’m not even kidding. This is some seriously deviant behavior. Someone get this guy some help before he starts doing even more bizarre things. Guys who are about to play in one of the most prestigious college football games of all time should not be getting arrested for rubbing one out a few weeks before the game. That should be a rule, somewhere.
First they get rolled by their arch rival Ohio State and needed to back into the Rose Bowl. Then their all-conference Offensive Lineman went nuts in a bar after urinating on the floor and started playing the ‘do-you-know-who-I-am?’ card then gets tossed in the slam.
And now this: Defensive Lineman Larry Harrison Jr. was suspended from the team after he was arraigned on one count of indecent exposure. He was caught masturbating on the on the porch of a house occupied by several women shortly after midnight. Harrison is also a suspect in a number of other, 14 to be precise, indecent exposure cases. Whoa. It's one thing to have a few too many beers and get into trouble or a fight, but to be a serial masturbator? That’s bad. Very bad.
And head coach Lloyd Carr agrees with me. “These charges are very serious and very alarming. I can only hope that they are not true.”
You and me both, coach. Alarming is putting is mildly. Terrifying, despicable, disgusting, unsanitary are all words that work well here.
I guess everyone likes to get ready for the Rose Bowl in their own unique way. Some guys do extra film study. Some guys put in some extra time in the weight room. Some guys read the playbook. And I guess some guys like to go around town rubbing one out on neighborhood porches. Someone get this guy some help. I’m not even kidding. This is some seriously deviant behavior. Someone get this guy some help before he starts doing even more bizarre things. Guys who are about to play in one of the most prestigious college football games of all time should not be getting arrested for rubbing one out a few weeks before the game. That should be a rule, somewhere.